Submitted by: Dj Simo
You have left your previous job to accept employment with
Happitec and you have moved to a new address. Happitec is sending
you on a vacation to Paris. All you have to do is wait for the
money order which Happitec is sending to you, pick up your plane
ticket, and board the plane. So you think! It seems the removals
company has misplaced all your belongings. The Change of Address
card which you were to file somehow got sent to your old address.
The new owner of your old home sent your mail to your old bank.
Check out your wallet and you find that you have no money, an
expired US Excess card and a Beezer card. Your new home contains a
few meager possession, i.e., your Boysenberry computer, a
telephone/answering machine and a few miscellaneous items. Take
everything you can for you'll need everything you can find to solve
this game. Listen to the messages on the telephone/answering
machine. Consult your Address Book and call all the numbers listed.
You'll learn a lot by doing this.
The doorbell rings. Chowmail Overnite is delivering a large
bag of Llamex(R) brand High-Fibre Llama Treats. You didn't order
it, the address is wrong; but, you'll never be able to explain
anything to the delivery man, so just give him your Beezer card.
You are now the proud owner of a bag of llama treats!
There's nothing else to do in the house for now, so explore
your new neighborhood starting with your mailbox. The mail found in
each location seems to be random. For example, in one game you
might find a leaflet in the mailbox and in another game find a
flyer in the mailbox. That isn't important. The postage is
important so try to remember what type of postage was used and the
order in which you find it. The mail you find in your mailbox has
a postage stamp on it.
Go to the bookstore. You'll notice it's actually a software
store. Talk to the clerk. Ask him about software. He'll offer you
a *special* cart which he keeps under the counter. SHOW the game
cartridge to the clerk. He'll take it and give you a Recipe Cart.
I found that I got a point for this, but did not get a point if I
said TRADE cartridges.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 1 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
Go to the Travel Agency. Give the letter to the Agent and get
your round-trip ticket to Paris.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 2 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
Go to the bank and try to file a Change-of-Address form. Lots
of luck! The bank has already sent you a Change-of-Address form and
one is all you are allowed. Too bad it was sent to your old
Go to the old tenement building. There are stairs leading up and a
door in the south wall. Nothing can be done about the blank wall at
the top of the stairs, so forget it. Knock on the south door. A
voice will answer and the door will open. Enter the flat which is
occupied by a mousy little man. Seems he collects stamps. You will
see some mail in the floor but the man won't let you pick it up.
Show the stamped envelope to the man. He'll grab it and run out of
the flat. Pick up the mail. Notice the Postal Service sticker.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 3 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
By this time you will probably be getting hungry, so go to the
Restaurant. The waitress will take your order then return to tell
you that your order was lost due to a computer crash. Of course,
it's her break time, so someone else will take your order. You must
go through the long ordering process all over again. Wait for your
order and eat whatever you get.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 4 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
You have no money to pay the bill, so sneak out the back door
of the restaurant into the alley. From the alley you can squeeze
through a gap in the fence to arrive at Behind Mansion. Enter the
back door of the mansion. Here you'll find a macaw sitting on a
perch. You can see some mail under the perch but the macaw will not
allow you to take it. Go into the Trophy Room. It's a good idea to
save the game first because the old woman shoots. Make a fast exit.
Go to the front door of the mansion and ring the bell, then beat
feet to the back door. Return to the Trophy Room, grab the painting
of Ronald Reagan and exit. Show the painting to the macaw then take
the mail from under the perch. Notice the Postal Service sticker.
Go to the llama farm. Open the bag of llama treats. Push the
bag through the mailbox so that it falls into the trough. While the
llama is eating the treats, take the mail from the trough. Notice
the Postal Service sticker.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 6 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
Try to enter the farmhouse. The door won't budge. You must go
away and return later. Go south to the gate. There's an intercom at
the gate. It will crackle to life and a voice will say,
"Unfortunately, there's a radio connected to my brain." Could this
be a password? Go back to the farmhouse. A heavily armed man
resembling Woody Allen will appear in the doorway. He is rather
dazed -- not sure where he is or who you are. Say: "Unfortunately,
there's a radio connected to my brain." He will respond with:
"Actually, it's the BBC controlling us from London." You can try
more conversation or merely wait for him to leave. Return to the
Again, the voice over the intercom will say, "Unfortunately,
there's a radio connected to my brain." You must say, "Actually,
it's the BBC controlling us from London." The gate will open. Enter
You'll meet the paranoid owner of the house and discover the
armed man is here also. The paranoid householder suspects you are
an imposter so he will ask you a series of questions. To answer
correctly, you must refer to the "Popular Paranoia" magazine which
is included in your game package. One wrong answer and you're dead.
Answer them all correctly and you'll find yourself in a gaol cell
in the basement of the paranoid's house.
Examine the gaol door. Try cutting the molybdenum bars with
the hacksaw. The armed man will give you the Swiss army knife.
Examination of the knife will reveal a button marked POWER SAW and
a lever marked GENERATOR. Push the button then pull the lever.
Examine both the saw and the generator. Take the power saw and plug
it into the generator. Get on the generator (it resembles a
bicycle) and start pedaling. Oops! You can't reach the bars while
sitting on the generator, so give the power saw to the armed man.
He'll cut the door open for you. It's best to stall around in the
Basement allowing the armed man to go up the stairs before you. The
paranoid man and the armed man will depart. You'll see some mail in
the foyer. Don't be surprised if you can't pick up the money order
which you want so badly. Take the envelope.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 7 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
The envelope contains a memo and a cheque. The check is drawn
on the Fillmore Fiduciary Trust in the amount of -$75.00. Yes,
that's a minus sign. Go to the bank. Get a withdrawal slip. Fill it
out then take it to the Deposit window. Give the cheque and the
withdrawal slip to the teller. You are depositing -$75.00 using a
withdrawal slip which is the negative of a deposit slip, negative
-$75 is $75. Makes perfect sense. Then go back to the withdrawal
window. Fill out another withdrawal slip and withdraw $75.00.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 8 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
Now that you have money, you might want to return to the
restaurant to pay your bill.
You are ready to go to the Airport. Call Getlost Airport Cab
(number listed in your Address Book). Wait for the taxi.
Oh, the Airport is a fun place! Since you have an Omnia Gallia
ticket, you should go directly to the Omnia Gallia desk. Alas,
Omnia Gallia has been sold. For further information you must go to
the Air Galagasa desk. How do you find it? Well, the way that
worked for me was going back to the airport entrance, then going
through Lost and Found. Air Zalagasa seems to be north of the Lost
and Found. It doesn't matter how early or late you arrive at the
Air Zalagasa desk. A fat man will always be in line ahead of you
and he'll cause you to miss the plane. Not to worry. When your turn
finally comes, give the Omnia Gallia ticket to the clerk in
exchange for an Air Zalagasa ticket.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 9 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
Once you have the Air Zalagasa ticket in your hot little hand,
go south one move and climb the pillar. Open the grate and climb up
the duct. You'll eventually reach the Control Tower. A console
radio will crackle, "Air Zalagasa flight 42 requests permission to
take off." Say: "Controller, permission denied." Go back to the top
of the pillar and examine the speaker. Pull red wire then pull
black wire. Connect red wire to black wire. You have short
circuited all the speakers in the terminal. The applause of the
crowd is deafening!
Before you know what's happening, you'll find yourself on the
plane in seat 3B. Shortly thereafter, the attendant will bring you
a bowl of llama stew. Eat the stew and you die. Refuse to eat it
and you die. How can you get rid of the stew? The only way I could
get rid of it was to cause the seat ahead of me to recline, thus
spilling the stew. By wearing the headphones, changing seats, and
pushing buttons, you'll learn that the whole system is mixed up.
The light button reclines the seats but you'll have to experiment
to determine which light button controls which seat.
Here's one way to do it: Before the attendant brings the stew,
move to Seat 3C. Wait a few turns. The attendant will bring the
stew. Leave it on your fold-out table and move to Seat 8D. Push the
light button which actually reclines the seat ahead of Seat 3C.
That seat will recline, thus spilling the stew.
After the stew is spilled, return to Seat 3C. You'll see a
small piece of laminated card. Examine this and take note of the
words "STINGLAI KA'ABI." There will be a telephone call for you, go
to the phone. Most likely, it will be the waitress asking about the
tip you left. The line will be disconnected and you'll overhear
another conversation. About this time the flight attendant will ask
you to return to your seat; however, she will linger, giving you a
chance to talk to her. Say: Attendant, STINGLAI KA'ABI. You'll
receive a parachute. Go to the rear of the plane, open hatch, and
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 12 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
My Gawd! One strap of your parachute is caught in the plane's
hatch. This can be deadly. Chances are you'll soon be falling
without a parachute! Knock on the hatch. The attendant will open
it, freeing your parachute strap. Falling! Don't forget to pull the
Hanging from a tree! Yep, you landed in a tree. Get out of the
You are now in a cooking pot. Okay, the natives are hungry, so
give them a good recipe. Boot up your Boysenberry and insert the
Recipe Cart. The natives will give you an unlabelled cartridge and
return your lost address book. Don't ask me how they got it.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 14 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
You are now in the Antechamber. Not clear how you got here.
You'll see a closed locker door in the west wall and an exit to the
east. Examine the locker door and read the sign. The left handle is
pointing up. The middle handle is pointing down. The right handle
is pointing up. It's a key of sorts. A general knowledge of binary
helps. Okay, here's a solution:
(1) Turn left handle and middle handle. You hear a click
inside the door.
(2) Turn left handle and right handle. You hear a click
inside the door.
(3) Turn left handle and middle handle. You hear a sharp
click, as if something inside the door had moved. Open
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 15 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
Enter the locker and take the magnetic key-card. Then go east.
You're in the Switchgear Rooms; it's a maze! Time to use your
Boysenberry computer, so insert the unlabelled cartridge. Remember,
earlier in this walkthru I advised you to notice the Postal Service
stickers and the order in which you found them. Hope you paid
attention, because you need that info now. I found the Postal
stickers in this order: C, D, E and B. The computer program
(unlabelled cartridge) gives you a list of commands: CLEAR ,NOOZ,
PRINTB, PRINTC, PRINTD, PRINTE. You must select the PRINT commands
in the same order that you found the postal stickers. I used
PRINTC, PRINTD, PRINTE, and PRINTB because that's the order in
which I found the postal stickers. When you have done this, you
should have a complete message on the screen. Can't read it? Oh, I
forget to tell you: read from top to bottom one letter at a time.
Using these instructions you should be able to find your way
through the maze to the Airlock.
In the Airlock, put the key-card in the card reader slot.
You'll hear a bolt snapping back. Open the door. It will take
several tries. Enter the Persecution Complex!
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 17 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
The Persecution Complex is a long hall running west. There are
TV screens on each side of the hall. Go west looking at the screens
on either side as you go. At the end of the hall you'll find a
modular plug. Plug in your computer. You'll be asked for ID and
password. What? Okay, take a look at your Address Book. Notice
anything different? Right! The first address has been changed.
That's the clue you need. Type in RANDOM-Q-HACKER for ID and
RAINBOW-TURTLE for password. Connection will be made. Use command
DIR for a listing of programs, WHO for a listing of users, and TYP
for some *interesting* tidbits. You'll learn that two hackers have
accessed the system. You are one; the nerd is the other.
You'll also be advised when the Nerd is about to access
another file. The TYP command will enable you to learn of a certain
file which should NOT be used with a friendly computer. Hmmm, what
if you changed the name of that file? So, change the name of
DVH2.HAK to whatever file the Nerd is preparing to access. Example:
Nerd is about to access FIDUC.HAK.
Change name of DVH2.HAK to FICUC.HAK. It might be necessary to
first change the name of FIDUC.HAK to something else, but you'll
have plenty of time to do that. By doing this, you will cause the
Nerd to access a file which will destroy his own mainframe. Revenge
Once you have done this, an opening to the west will appear.
It is *IMPORTANT* to run the PLANE.EXE program at some Press
for more time before you reap your revenge. This will cause a plane
to be sent to get you.
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 20 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.
Wait patiently at the Landing Strip. The plane you summoned
while using the PLANE.EXE program will eventually arrive. You'll be
taken on a nice plane trip and a predictable taxi ride, arriving at
the Hallway of the Tenement. From there, go to your home. You'll
find a new letter from Fiduciary apologizing for the problems
you've had. Enclosed in the letter you'll find a ticket to Paris,
your checkbook and a new Beezer card. Congratulations...
YOUR SCORE IS NOW 21 OF A POSSIBLE 21 POINTS.