The NOexistenceN of you AND me Cheats

The NOexistenceN of you AND me

Cheat Codes:
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Submitted by: David K.

How to Bake a Strawberry Cake:
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Written by Not_Doge

-=Ingredients for the cake=-
* An oven (a time machine doesn't work for this)
* 1 ½ cups (190g) all-purpose flour
* 1 ½ teaspoons baking powder
* ½ teaspoon baking soda
* ¼ teaspoon salt
* 1 cup (200g) granulated sugar
* ½ cup (115g) unsalted butter, softened
* 2 large eggs
* ½ cup (120ml) whole milk (you can use buttermilk for extra richness)
* ½ cup (120ml) pureed fresh strawberries (about 6-8 medium strawberries)
* 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
* 2-3 drops of red food coloring (optional, to enhance color)

-=Ingredients for the frosting=-
* 8 oz (225g) cream cheese, softened
* ½ cup (115g) unsalted butter, softened
* 4 cups (500g) powdered sugar
* 1-2 tablespoons pureed fresh strawberries (strained to remove seeds)
* 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
* Pinch of salt

-=Step by step=-
(Brick by brick)

1. Prepare the Strawberries
* Wash and hull the strawberries, then blend them until smooth in a food processor 
  or blender. You should have about ½ cup of strawberry puree. Set aside.
* Optionally, strain the puree to remove seeds if you prefer a smooth texture in 
  your frosting.

2. Make the Cake
* MAKE YOUR OVEN REMEMBER THAT IT'S AN OVEN
* Preheat your oven to 350°F (175°C). Grease and flour two 8-inch round cake pans, 
  or line them with parchment paper.
* In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. 
  Set aside.
* In a large bowl, cream together the butter and sugar using a hand mixer or stand 
  mixer on medium speed until light and fluffy (about 3-4 minutes).
* Add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition. Scrape down the 
  sides of the bowl as needed.
* Stir in the vanilla extract and pureed strawberries. If you're using food coloring, 
  add it here.
* Gradually add the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients in 2-3 parts, alternating 
  with the milk. Start and end with the dry ingredients. Mix until just combined—do 
  not overmix.
* Divide the batter evenly between the prepared cake pans.

3. Bake
* Bake the cakes for 25-30 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center of 
  the cakes comes out clean. (constantly remind your oven that it's an oven if needed)
* Remove the cakes from the oven and let them cool in the pans for about 10 minutes. 
  Then, turn them out onto wire racks to cool completely.

4. Make the Frosting
* In a large bowl, beat the cream cheese and butter together until smooth and creamy.
* Gradually add the powdered sugar, about 1 cup at a time, beating on low speed until 
  combined. Increase the speed and continue beating until the frosting is light and 
  fluffy (about 3-4 minutes).
* Add the pureed strawberries, vanilla extract, and a pinch of salt. Mix until fully 
  incorporated. If the frosting is too thick, you can add a bit more strawberry puree 
  or a tablespoon of milk to reach the desired consistency.

5. Assemble the Cake
* Once the cakes have cooled completely, place one layer of cake on a serving platter 
  or cake stand.
* Spread a generous amount of frosting over the first layer, smoothing it evenly with 
  a spatula.
* Place the second layer of cake on top and frost the top and sides of the cake with the 
  remaining frosting.
* Optionally, decorate with fresh strawberries or a few strawberry slices on top for an 
  extra decorative touch.

6. Serve
* Allow the cake to set for about 30 minutes to an hour for the frosting to firm up a 
  bit before slicing and serving.
* Enjoy your homemade strawberry cake!

DISCLAIMER
The maker of this recipe is not responsible for any damage, mishap, or time-space 
continuum anomalies that may occur as a result of following these instructions. This 
includes, but is not limited to, any accidental trips through time caused by oven 
malfunctions, cakes turning into sentient beings, or any unforeseen baking-related 
time paradoxes. Please bake responsibly and with caution. Enjoy your cake, but do not 
be held liable for any unexpected journeys to the past or future.

In the event of an oven transforming into a time machine or other related inconveniences, 
please contact Lilith for further assistance.

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